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Weekend Horoscopes For December 21-23, 2018 Betches

The best, and possibly only good thing, about the shortest day of the year starting this weekend is that now we’re on the uphill climb, slowly getting more and more daylight each day. I can already feel my Vitamin D levels rising and my mood greatly improving. This weekend is also the official start to Capricorn season. It’s okay to indulge in the practical. Don’t go outside when it’s cold AF for any reason. Drink the rest of the vodka because it goes bad if you open it. Block your ex because if Santa won’t bring him coal, he certainly deserves the coldest of shoulders. Here are your weekend horoscopes for December 21-23:

Aries

The Moon in Cancer warms your cold heart this weekend. It also gives you major nesting vibes. You’re craving all the creature comforts the holiday season brings: warm socks, fuzzy blankets, hot drinks that may or may not involve a splash of something out of the liquor cabinet. Make a resolution for the rest of 2018 that you won’t be wearing any pants with zippers or buttons. Do you feel an Instagram pic of your feet next to a fire and beautifully decorated hearth coming on, or is that just me?

Taurus

If you don’t already have gifts for your besties, you’ll probably feel the urge to run to the nearest artisanal candle store and buy everyone you know a little something. Betches love candles. The Moon’s glow in Cancer shines in your house of Friendship. Your desire to be social and show your friends you care is at an all-time high this weekend. If you’re not really a gift-giving person, make it a goal to make plans and actually follow through with them while you and your friends have some time off.

Gemini

Don’t fret over the cash you have to spend to be social this weekend. Every dollar spent will be worth it. Somehow. I’m pretty sure. This is an excellent weekend for making the right connections to pursue your goals, whether that be securing the hottest date ever for New Years Eve or networking with someone who can help you get the job of your dreams. Wear semi-comfortable shoes and mix with diet Redbull so you have the energy and stamina to stick around when the conversations starts heating up.

Cancer

The Full Moon in your sign this weekend gives you energy and power. Put that burst of energy to use by accomplishing all the stuff you didn’t get to this entire year. Clean out your closet, throw away the college Halloween costume that would take an act of God to fit into again. Delete old emails and phone numbers of anyone with the last name of “Hinge”. Actually vacuum instead of just thinking that you need to every time you step on an extremely sharp and invisible mystery object on your bedroom carpet.

Leo

TBH, the Sun moving into Capricorn is kind of a major killjoy for you. Your practical, logical side takes over this weekend. Since you don’t want to have to diet like a maniac and hit the gym with sad, gross resolutioners come January 1, you’ll probably start considering cutting back on the festive treats. You might want to trade the Christmas cookies for crunches, hot chocolate for hot yoga, candy canes for carrots. Need I go on?

Virgo

No fake friends for the Virgo betches this weekend. The planets pull you to spend time with people with whom you share a genuine connection. Like, maybe your high school friends want to get together for drinks while everyone is home. That’s nice and all, but you haven’t talked to any of these people in years and probably shouldn’t care to start now. Did they bail you out when you spent all your rent money on mozzarella sticks and Ugg boots in college? No, that was your mom and dad.  Spend time with them instead.

Libra

Even though the long nights of winter are a downer, you won’t be in a horrible mood heading into the weekend as a Mercury-Jupiter merger makes you optimistic. No longer will you tell your friends you don’t want to go out with them to prowl for dudes because guys are only on the apps. Instead, you’ll be motivated to wrangle your girls into a push-up bra and head out with the crew. You’ll start seeing the world as your oyster instead of a horrible hellscape on the imminent path toward destruction. I mean, also stay off Twitter to keep that sunny outlook in tact, even if it’s just for the weekend.

Scorpio

The Sun in Capricorn in your house of communication makes you chattier than normal. You usually have no problem keeping everyone’s secrets on the DL, including your own. This weekend, though, you’ll be more likely to experience foot-in-mouth disorder. Watch what you say and who you say it around, especially if you’re drinking. Whatever your truth serum is, avoid that. No tequila for the Scorpio this weekend!

Sagittarius

An intense, romantic weekend could be in store for you and your significant other. Everything won’t necessarily be lovey-dovey. A fight or argument could lead to a resolution that not only brings you both closer together, but also gets a little hot and steamy. They say makeup sex is the best for a reason. For a single Sagittarius, don’t fear. It’s not about labels and things going exactly as planned this weekend. Let the chips fall where they may.

Capricorn

There’s, like, a lot going on for you right now. The Sun in your sign brings you loads of attention. The Full Moon in Cancer makes you lovable. If your friends turn down an invitation to do something with you this weekend, it’s probably because they already have plans to be at your surprise party. How could anyone say no to you? Like, really, if someone is “busy” or “sick” or  “already has plans” is seriously disturbed.

Aquarius

The end of your Zodiac year and the calendar year is all about tying up loose ends. This weekend you’ll start wrapping up what you’re leaving behind in preparation for what’s to come. That could mean your relationship red flags turn into deal breakers over the holidays. Maybe your Christmas bonus at work isn’t what you expected and you feel you could be more highly valued at a different company. There’s a lot to learn in the next two weeks.

Pisces

A Pisces usually isn’t the most festive in the room, but the Sun in Capricorn makes you weirdly flamboyant. Prepare to pull every shiny, sparkly, or fuzzy article of clothing out from your closet. If there’s an ugly sweater to be worn, you’ll be wearing it. If there’s “Santa Baby” or “All I Want For Christmas” on the karaoke machine, you’ll sing it. With the Full Moon in Cancer, you’re likely to turn a few heads. Welcome the attention like a friend showing up unexpectedly at your door with booze in hand.

Images: Giphy (6)

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